day 53

28th oct 07
what a crabby cow I have been today!! Not a nice person to be with and definately feeling put on by everybody else! Sent them all out to play/watch rugby and managed to get to grips with washing, ironing, cooking spag bol and catching up on my life, so marginally more happy when they got back! Z's team beat Tavistock and C enjoyed hopping around on crutches and getting lots of sympathy...Went to see my friend for a drink, haven't seen her since i started so lots of positives from her and I remembered my peppermint tea bag which she was very impressed at! Had a good catch up on photos and gossip which always makes me feel better!Went on ebay to try to get a pair of jeans and marginally lost the only ones I wanted, but I did buy a very plain black dress for a posh do I have in dec..it was v cheap and I got a size 18, which may or may not fit by then!! I thought with black I can dress it up with something like a cerise shrug, pashmina and new shoes..and if it is too big then so be it and i shall be off to monsoon!!I think I may have to not cook for a few days as I am struggling with it at the mo and was pinching bits of meat out of the bol sauce, a habit I need to knock on the head right now! Have had a couple of bits of chicken this week, not much but its a bad habit. I am lucky that I am still in ketosis but it almost feels like I am trying to challenge that and self sabotage raises its ugly head!! Why???! Because, thats why...!